“Every time you meet a situation, though you think at the time it is an impossibility and you go through the tortures of the damned, once you have met it and lived through it, you find that forever after you are freer than before.” ~ Unknown
That’s a great description of my feeling about midlife divorce … “the tortures of the damned.” I know that if you are in the early phases of this midlife divorce recovery journey, you too can identify with the “tortures of the damned” part of that quote. What you probably don’t get yet is the fact that “forever after you are freer than before.” But it’s true!
Freedom To Create Joy
At the beginning of my divorce recovery journey, I thought that I would never really be happy again or find a new passion for my life that would bring thrill to my heart every day. My kids were busy with their own lives, and I thought I would be stuck in the middle of some unfulfilling half-life of just an okay existence at best.
But I was so wrong! The experience of divorce, as torturous as it was, taught me that the freedom to create our own joy is not dependent on any outward circumstances. And learning that is the highest level of freedom!
Living Above Our Circumstances
After coping with a divorce, we learn to consciously live above our circumstances. Our life, and the pleasure and fun we create are a conscious designing of the life we want — our true life. Even if we are forced to start over in a new place, whether that be an apartment, or our car, we still have the power to create our own joy.
The thing is, most of us don’t learn this lesson until we have met and lived through “the tortures of the damned.” Some people coast through their okay life and never learn that incredibly liberating lesson!
Don’t waste these lessons! Your life can definitely be changed for the good forever after, and you will be stronger and freer and more fulfilled than you ever thought possible. Take heart; there is life after divorce!
“Now the Lord is the Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom.” ~ 2 Corinthians 3:17 (NIV)