Alert! Don’t Be a Victim After Divorce

Alert! Don’t Be a Victim After Divorce

2018-01-10T18:10:49+00:00

“Parking garages rank third among top locations for violent crime (after homes and public streets).  From BE SAFE – Simple strategies for Death-Free Living by Melissa Heckscher.

One of the things about a midlife divorce is that often you are living alone, and there is no one around who reminds you to be careful or who cares whether you eat your broccoli or not.  That’s one of those little things that made me sad.  And it took time for me to adjust to not having anyone to remind to be careful as well.

The first time I went on a trip by myself, I realized I had no one to call to say I got there okay.  That realization was significant.  And I cried about it.  I could have called my kids, and they often checked up on me as did other family members and friends, but if you are living alone, it’s an adjustment to realize that you are on your own for that stuff.

Personal safety is our responsibility.  We know what we’re supposed to do, but it takes getting used to not having anyone around to remind you.  There is a definite realization in this divorce recovery process that you are responsible for yourself.  That’s okay.  In fact, it can be very empowering.  One way to take charge is to put in place a friend or family member who you can call for emergencies and for just plain old reassurance.

I came across the little book quoted above at a Half-Price book store.  it is chock full of things like:  “what is the safest:  seat on a plane; lane on a highway, color of car; way to defrost meat, seat at a concert” etc.  Just to let you know, the safest place to park in a parking garage is “on the ground floor near the attendant.”  Note:  elevators and stairs are the most dangerous spots in a garage.  (A would-be robber approached me in a parking garage a few years back, so I guess this advice stood out.)  For your information, the safest stall in a public restroom is the first one.  (It is least used and usually has more toilet paper.)  Also, the safest color of car to drive is yellow or lime green.

I could go on and on.  I just wanted to tell you today to be safe, especially now.  Don’t become a victim.  At a recent divorce recovery boot camp I held, a self-defense expert talked on personal safety … how to keep from becoming a victim.  Part of her advice:  “Be alert and be on your toes.  Walk confidently and think proactively,” and by the way, drink enough water and eat your veggies, too.

Yes, be bold and strong!  Banish fear and doubt!  For remember, the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.”  Joshua 1:9 (The Living Bible)

About the Author:

Suzy developed Midlife Divorce Recovery as a safe refuge for people healing and surviving the overwhelm of divorce. Starting her first RADiCAL support group in 2003 she's been helping women navigate the journey of divorce ever since.