Divorce tip for Veteran’s Day

2018-01-10T18:10:52+00:00

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“War is an extreme test of will. Friction, uncertainty, fluidity, disorder and danger are its essential features.”    Warfighting – U.S. Marine Corps

When I started doing day-long Divorce Recovery Boot Camps, I started studying the U.S. Marines and their Boot Camps and how they go about preparing young people to face the enemy. I read a manual put out by the Marine Corps called Warfighting. This manual talks about the Nature of War, The Theory of War, Preparing for War and The Conduct of War. I was surprised at all of the similarities between war and life … and war and divorce. The chapter from which the quote above was taken talks about the essential features of war which are “friction, uncertainty, fluidity, disorder and danger.”  Haven’t you all felt those five things while going through your divorce?

Marines learn to deal with those things. They learn to keep a cool head in spite of danger, uncertainty and disorder all around them. I can’t think of a time when my life was more disordered and uncertain than during my divorce. In reading this manual, I learned more about how the Marines learn to handle those challenging, terrifying, uncertain situations  … Besides killing someone!

For starters, Marines get in shape physically and one of their basic bedrocks of behavior is that they “always strive to do the right thing in every circumstance.”  Those two things could pretty much be our own bedrock of behavior not only during our personal divorce “war,” but all through life.  Let’s try to put them both to work just today and see what happens.  Be healthy.  Do right.    Every time you do something today.  Ask yourself, “Is this good for my body?  Is this the right thing to do?”  Let me know if it makes a difference.
“Be prepared. You’re up against far more than you can handle on your own. Take all the help you can get, every weapon God has issued, so that when it’s all over but the shouting you’ll still be on your feet. Truth, righteousness, peace, faith and salvation are more than words. Learn how to apply them. You’ll need them throughout your life. God’s Word is an indispensable weapon. In the same way, prayer is essential in this ongoing warfare. Pray hard and long. Pray for your brothers and sisters. Keep your eyes open. Keep each other’s spirits up so that no one falls behind or drops out.”   Ephesians 6:11-20 (The Message)

P.S.  Thank a veteran today.  Just walk up to them and tell them, “I appreciate your service.”  Believe me it will make make their day.  We owe them all so much.  My parents were both veterans.  My mom was an Army nurse.  My Dad was in Patton’s Third Army, the Sixth Armored Division.  I always called them and told them I was proud of everything they did in WWII to preserve freedom.  They appreciated it every single year.  Try it.  See what happens.

About the Author:

Suzy developed Midlife Divorce Recovery as a safe refuge for people healing and surviving the overwhelm of divorce. Starting her first RADiCAL support group in 2003 she's been helping women navigate the journey of divorce ever since.