Money, divorce and overcoming limitations


“All limitations are self imposed.” ~ Oliver Wendell Holmes

As a couple, my wasband and I worked as a team. I contributed by working until we started having children (we had three children who were four and under… then another 11 years later)! I didn’t finish college at that time even though I did get my degree in 1995, 31 years later!

After the children were born I worked from home for my family’s card company and then had my own marketing and advertising company, which I also did from home. I never made much, but it added to our family’s bottom line. I took care of things on the home front, making sure life ran (mostly) smooth for our family. I loved that role. But it meant that my career path (my money-earning potential) was compromised.

It’s very hard to have a family with two people seriously dedicated to striving after professional growth. There are couples who do this beautifully and I think it’s more common in today’s world than when most baby-boomers were in that spot. I wouldn’t change much from those years of raising a family. My wasband and our children (and our community) benefited from my contributions in many ways. But when a long-term marriage suddenly comes to an end, and a woman is expected to immediately start supporting herself, she is at an incredible disadvantage.

However, in our fear and hopelessness about our financial situation, we sometimes start thinking we have no control. Barbara Stanny states in her book, Overcoming Underearning, that “we believe the big lie… which is an extraordinary self-deception where we convince ourselves we’re powerless.” Regardless of where we start our financial journey back to self-sufficiency, we have the power to take care of ourselves and find a joyful financial independence which Stanny defines as “Having the resources to live a satisfying, comfortable life, accomplish your dreams and goals, and have more fun doing what you do.”

For the next few days we’re going to talk about the journey to financial fulfillment. Regardless of where you’re at now, start by realizing that you are in charge of your future. Don’t let any self-imposed limitations keep you from chasing after a successful future!

“ … with God everything is possible.” ~ Matthew 19:26b (ESV)

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Radical Recovery - By Suzy Brown

Transforming the Despair of Your Divorce Into an Unexpected Good
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About the Author:

Suzy developed Midlife Divorce Recovery as a safe refuge for people healing and surviving the overwhelm of divorce. Starting her first RADiCAL support group in 2003 she's been helping women navigate the journey of divorce ever since.

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