Helping Others After Divorce

Helping Others After Divorce

2018-01-11T16:29:10+00:00

“Every day, tell at least one person something you like, admire, or appreciate about them.” ~ Richard Carlson, Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff

Be An Encourager

In the middle of divorce we are inundated by our own problems. Our plates are overflowing with discouragements. But the really cool truth is, when we reach out to someone else to build them up, it is good for us too. There is healing in helping others.

I read a story about a young man who was frequently teased in school because, though he was very smart, he was not athletic. One day after school a girl had the courage to go up to him and say something about how she was impressed with how smart he was in math.

The day that girl complimented him for being smart in math, he had been making plans to commit suicide. He had a gun waiting at home. She changed the course of his life, and many other lives by simply taking the time and having the heart to be an encourager. He became a great success and had a very positive impact on many lives.

Helping Others Brings Healing

Recently a RADiCAL woman called me and told me that she had come in contact with several other women also on that road to recovery (that’s not unusual by the way… in fact, they fall in our laps at every turn it seems). She wanted to help them by sharing what’s she’s learned so far. Her thoughtful and generous heart will bring about blessings upon herself, as it will to those she helps!

What if, in the midst of really awful pain like divorce, we tried the strategy of going out of our way to encourage someone else? Our encouragement can be as simple as a smile or kind word, or a note or email to someone who might need it. Or it can be starting a RADiCAL group in your church or neighborhood.

When we see the benefits of telling someone something we admire or appreciate about them, and we put it into practice, we will undoubtedly see benefits. And the post-divorce healing will come on it’s own.

What You Plant, You Reap

Let’s all try it today. Let’s see how it makes us feel (and by the way, don’t expect thanks or recognition… just do it with no motive except to shine our light in every way we can.) And remember, what you plant, you reap. That is an absolute unchanging law of the universe. Pant the seeds of goodness, kindness and a helpful heart and see the “flowers” bloom.

“Don’t just pretend that you love others. Really love them. Hate what is wrong. Stand on the side of the good. Love each other with genuine affection, and take delight in honoring each other.” ~ Romans 12:9-10 (The Living Bible)

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About the Author:

Suzy developed Midlife Divorce Recovery as a safe refuge for people healing and surviving the overwhelm of divorce. Starting her first RADiCAL support group in 2003 she's been helping women navigate the journey of divorce ever since.