The Good Life After Divorce


“You have to count on living every single day in a way you believe will make you feel good about your life — so that if it were over tomorrow, you’d be content with yourself.” ~ Jane Seymour, Actor

Before my mom died, she and I had a conversation about her life, and she made the statement that she might change a few details, but there wasn’t really anything big she would change. I thought to myself, “Can I say that?” Can you? In the middle of my midlife divorce and the recovery, every single day was a struggle, and there were thousands of things I wanted to change. The main one being that the divorce had never happened.

As hard as I tried to stop my divorce, it did happen.  There is no doubt my life would have been easier without the divorce, and I would have cried millions fewer tears, but would I have the insights and relationships I have now?  Would I be simply coasting along with no clear purpose and direction other than the status quo?  God definitely had another plan, a good plan, that came along with the pain of my divorce.

There has been amazing renewed intimacy in my relationship with God.  He has given me an avenue to shine His light and help thousands of women that I would not otherwise have. Plus, in spite of the bad statistics about children of divorce, I believe my children are stronger and more grounded than ever, and I have had a chance to try to live out my faith in a way that might give them courage when facing discouragements of their own.

Even though I have made hundreds of mistakes, I feel good about where I am.  I am more confident now than ever before that my life is unfolding as it should. The truth is, I tried to not be divorced in every way I could, and it happened anyway. The only thing any of us can do going forward is to trust God to keep His promise to bring good out of everything that happens in our lives. Knowing that, we can embrace whatever bright future is ours. Hopefully, at every stage of our life we can all say, “If my life were over tomorrow I would be content with my life.” I am absolutely awed by the incredible, extraordinary blessings that come my way minute-by-minute as I journey on this wild adventure called life.

“That’s why we can be so sure that every detail in our lives of love for God is worked into something good.” ~ Romans 8:28 (The Message)

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About the Author:

Suzy developed Midlife Divorce Recovery as a safe refuge for people healing and surviving the overwhelm of divorce. Starting her first RADiCAL support group in 2003 she's been helping women navigate the journey of divorce ever since.

One Comment

  1. Contessa August 23, 2012 at 7:43 pm - Reply

    Great post! God always has a plan, and recovery is possible!

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