The Hard Work Of Faith After Divorce


“She said that faith is not about how we feel; it is about how we live.” ~ Anne Lamott, Plan B: Further Thoughts on Faith

The Despair Of Divorce

If you’re a normal woman going through the despair of divorce, things have been bleak for you. Any of us who have been through it, or are still going through it, have done our share of slogging and struggling.

During a midlife divorce, you feel crappy… to put it mildly. You feel sick. You feel like you want to strangle someone… or maybe two someones. You feel like God is not paying attention.

Living By Faith

What happens when you are trying to live by faith, and it just doesn’t seem to be working very well? I would say that your idea of living by faith is skewed.

Living by faith doesn’t mean you always feel wonderful or cheery, or that you only see the world as continually full of butterflies and daffodils. Living by faith means exactly that… living by faith.

It is choosing to live by the principles of the light, when you feel stuck in darkness. It means that, even though you are struggling through the desert, you still share the water you have. And even though you are crying a million tears, you choose to do the right thing (when you’d rather hit back or talk ugly or give someone what they deserve.)

When Life Isn’t According To Plan

Living by faith is easy when everything is going according to your plan. But it’s at midnight, alone in your bed, or when you are faced with unjust accusations after trying to do all of the right things, that the life of faith is most demanding… and God does His most amazing work in us.

“God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble.  Therefore we will not fear, though the earth give way and the mountains fall into the heart of the sea, though its waters roar and foam and the mountains quake with their surging.” ~ Psalm 46:1-3 (NIV)

Send Me The Course

Divorce Recovery Crash Course

Free 10 Day Email Series To Help You
Overcome The Pain & Hurt Of Divorce
Send Me The Course

About the Author:

Suzy developed Midlife Divorce Recovery as a safe refuge for people healing and surviving the overwhelm of divorce. Starting her first RADiCAL support group in 2003 she's been helping women navigate the journey of divorce ever since.


  1. Brkota October 19, 2012 at 5:56 am - Reply

    my prtanes have my prtanes have just recently been through divorce; im 15years old &blame myself for everthng , i cried myself to sleep th whole time ths was happening and i have twins little sistes (4years) and theyr always askng wher their daddy is ; they dont understand ;i try tel them thd hes gone away for a little while and they start to cry, i carnt even think to imagine what they would do if they found out their daddy isnt coming back at all . i hate it . its too hard :'(

  2. Lucy Goddard February 19, 2017 at 9:17 pm - Reply

    You sweet thing. How did you end up on here, looking after your little sisters is so kind. All you can do is hug them and read them stories. Are they old enough to draw their feelings using colours? You sound like you’re being really brave but you must be hurting yourself or is it a relief he’s gone?

Leave A Comment