Get totally in the moment of enjoying life fully and freely. Get outside your comfort zone and explore new things. Your future is a result of what you’re doing in this moment. Make it glorious!
“The future isn’t what it used to be.” Yogi Berra
I’m sure Yogi Berra made that statement to be funny. And to a normal person whose life is humming along, it would be, but in the early stages of my midlife divorce, that statement would have made me cry. One of the things that most distressed me about my divorce was that my future was going to be completely different that I expected it to be. My future changed dramatically the minute the divorce was final … and at that moment all I could see were the negatives about that. I had in my head how I thought my life would be … growing old with my husband; taking care of grandchildren together; travelling together, entertaining. When the divorce was final, I knew that the future I had in my head was never going to happen, and that was agony for me to face at the time. None of us likes change. None of us likes things forced upon us. All of us want to coast happily into a blissful sunset. Well, one thing I’ve learned is that a midlife divorce assures you that you’re not going to coast, placidly anywhere. As hard as it is to accept, that’s a fact. But in reality, the people who are purposely involved in life and energized by life and excited about life never coast anyway. Life is too invigorating for that. Life is too exhilarating for that. The challenges of life (as much as we cry about them at first) have the potential to make possible a new future that is beyond our wildest dreams. And you know what? My future has never looked brighter! I am excited to get up every single day. I have a purpose and I see life with brand new (more appreciative) eyes. My children are catching the excitement. I’m relating to my grandchildren in fun, new ways. My friends (believe it or not) seem a bit awed by my new purpose and energy. So accept the fact that as Yogi says, “The future isn’t what it used to be,” and accept that it can be better than you can even imagine!
For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lords, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” Jeremiah 29:11 (NIV)
Suzy developed Midlife Divorce Recovery as a safe refuge for people healing and surviving the overwhelm of divorce. Starting her first RADiCAL support group in 2003 she's been helping women navigate the journey of divorce ever since.