Don’t let your ex intimidate you during divorce

2018-01-10T18:10:47+00:00

So much that happens during divorce makes us feel hesitant, insecure and weak.  We are worried and fearful about so many things that seem out of our control.  But always keep in mind that there are actions that we can control, and one of those actions is the subconscious message we send by how we look … our demeanor, our posture.

If you’ve read my blog very long you know that one book I mention regularly is a book entitled The 48 Laws of Power by Robert Green and Joost Eifers.  It’s a treasure house of practical advice.  I do not agree with everything in this book and it must be taken with a hearty dose of common sense, but the concepts are so appropriate for living day to day …. and especially for women who have been feeling powerless or at least less powerful than we want to feel.

Here’s a profound, but simple tip from the 48 Laws of Power:  “The way you carry yourself will often determine how you are treated.  How you carry yourself reflects what you think of yourself.  If you ask for little, shuffle your feet and lower your head, people will assume this reflects your character.”  The authors go on to say, by simply carrying ourselves confidently and, by adopting the “Columbus attitude” of  self assurance, we become “buoyant, confident, above the crowd and destined for greatness.”  This attitude has nothing to do with conceit or arrogance.  It exudes, instead, dignity, tranquility and worth.

Remember this:  You have the Spirit of God within you!  Act like it!  Don’t let the bad behavior of anyone else throw you off or disturb your poise.  In reality, whoever is causing you trouble will be amazed and astounded whether they admit it or not … and you gain everyone’s respect.  The worse those around you are acting, the more influence you have when you continue to carry yourself like the noble, strong, gracious person you are.

“For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love and of self-control.”  2 Timothy 1:7 (NIV)

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About the Author:

Suzy developed Midlife Divorce Recovery as a safe refuge for people healing and surviving the overwhelm of divorce. Starting her first RADiCAL support group in 2003 she's been helping women navigate the journey of divorce ever since.

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