When two people decide to get married, they are committing to a lifelong partnership with their spouse. However, some things may happen along the way of their married journey, such that two people who were once so in love and committed to each other decide to go their separate ways. In some instances, the couple is left with no other choice but to push through for a divorce. To help make the process a bit less painful and stressful mentally, emotionally, physically, and financially, various professionals can be of assistance.
Lawyers
Family Law Attorney
You need to keep in mind that divorce is a legal process, which is why the first professional you need to get in touch with, in this case, is a lawyer. As much as possible, make sure that you consult with a family law or divorce attorney who is in the best position to help you with your case. In this way, you will find it more seamless to deal even with the most complex issues surrounding your divorce. Just keep in mind to choose a lawyer who is not representing your spouse or someone who has not represented both you and your spouse together in any matter in the past.
When choosing a family law attorney, make sure to consider their reputation as well as whether they have ample experience when it comes to family law matters like divorce. They should also be familiar with the court systems of your local jurisdiction. As much as possible, go for the services of a lawyer who is currently practicing family law, rather than one who has been inactive in practice for a couple of years.
Amicable Settlement
In case you feel that both you and your spouse will most likely agree on most of the important issues that you need to decide on, you may be in for an uncontested case. With this, you may not even need a lawyer because you will be going through an amicable divorce. Just keep in mind that there are instances wherein this may not be the best option, particularly if you and your spouse are finding it difficult to see each other eye to eye.
Estate Or Tax Lawyer
Apart from a family law attorney, you may also want to seek the advice of an estate or tax attorney early on. They will be able to help you create a new will if necessary or update your beneficiaries in your health care proxy form to designate another person who should make decisions on your behalf in case you are incapacitated. On the other hand, a tax attorney will be able to shed light on matters such as finding that you might owe more taxes than you think you can pay. This may happen if you are not aware that your spouse has a tax problem.
Accountants
Another professional who will be able to help you get through your divorce with ease is an accountant. While not all couples may need the services of a professional accountant or a CPA, it will always be a good idea to have your finances in order before your divorce, during the process, or as soon as it is over. As much as possible, you need to go through the process with a clear understanding of where you stand financially.
An accountant will be able to help you collate the documents you need to separate your individual income and expenses from your income and expenses as a couple. They can also provide you with a good idea of the amount of money that you can work with right after the divorce process is over. In case you have a complex financial situation, such as wherein you own and run a business together with your spouse, then getting the advice of a CPA is even more essential. They will help ensure that both your business and personal finances are protected accordingly.
With the help of an accountant, you will also be able to prepare an after-divorce budget. If possible, you may even need to establish your own credit and eventually close joint credit accounts. But make sure not to close the latter before the divorce proceedings are over because in doing so, you may be held responsible for running charges later on.
What You Own And What You Owe
In parallel with working with an accountant, make sure that you already have a good idea of what you own individually and as a couple. From there, gather all the documentation that you can find for each asset because you will most likely need to turn this over to your attorney as well. In parallel to identifying what you own, you should also take the time to determine what you owe. Keep in mind that more often than not, marital debt is split based on who is more financially adept to pay rather than whose name the debt is in.
Counselors
Going through a divorce can bring about significant emotional and mental stress not only to you but also to your children. For this reason, you may also need to go through therapy conducted by licensed counselors and therapists. At this point, you may think that you need to show how strong you are, but the truth is you are vulnerable. Don’t make the mistake of thinking that you have to handle everything on your own, because many people can and are willing to extend a helping hand. Keep in mind that seeking help is not a sign of weakness.
When you can talk about your fears, frustrations, and problems, you will be in a better position to make more sensible decisions. This can be attributed to the fact that you are less likely to react with only your emotion. In case you deem that therapy is not for you, then you may want to consider whether it is your children who might need their services. Even if you think you and your spouse are alright with the process, your children may take it very differently.
Mediators
When you and your spouse often find it challenging to agree, then you may need to consult with a mediator. In this case, they will be able to help you come to terms when it comes to child care or even property division without having to go to court. More often than not, a mediator is also a lawyer, even if they don’t act as an attorney for either party when rendering their services as a mediator.
Just keep in mind to go for the services of a mediator who has ample background in mediation and family law. He or she should not be representing either you or your spouse in any matter as well. The best mediators are those who have a good reputation for being fair and balanced in rendering their services.
Childcare Provider
Rearing children can already prove to be challenging as a couple, but this can even be harder when you are going through a divorce process. The difficulty can even extend to after the divorce when you are all still in the adjustment phase. For this reason, having a reliable childcare provider can prove to be invaluable. They will be the ones who can keep an eye on your children when you need to review some paperwork or just indulge in some quiet time.
In choosing a sitter, it is ideal if you can hire one that you already know or is strongly recommended by your network. It is even better if the sitter has appropriate training or certifications like child CPR. In case you are keen on a childcare facility, then make sure that you go for ones that are certified, supporting transparent relationships with both parents. Tour their space and ensure that the facility provides a comfortable, safe, and educational space for your child.
Real Estate Agents
There are instances wherein you and your spouse may already decide to sell your existing home following a decision to get a divorce. In this case, you will need the services of a reliable real estate agent who will be able to sell your home for a good price. For this reason, make sure to find an agent who is already familiar with your area as well as someone willing to meet at times that fit your schedule.
However, some legal professionals may warn you from moving out of your home during the divorce process because this may hurt your case. Usually, the recommendation of legal experts is to stay in your marital home unless there is domestic abuse involved. The reason behind this is that moving can affect the interest you have in your marital home. For instance, if you move out and your spouse pays the entire mortgage throughout your divorce process, then the judge handling your case may factor this in his decision. Moving can also affect your kid’s school, which is why it is ideal to stay in your marital home, at least until after the school year ends.
Movers
After your divorce settlement is final, you may already plan to move. In this case, you will most likely need the services of professional movers. While you may have your friends and family members willing to lend a helping hand, the services of professionals may give everyone a break that they deserve. Just keep in mind to look for movers who employ clean and professional staff, as well as those who have excellent reviews.
Other Professionals
Some other professionals that may help you get through a rough divorce and start anew include cleaning services and mechanics, pest control, as well as insurance agents. In parallel, you may also find yourself no longer needing the services of the professionals you once engaged with when you were a couple. There are also instances wherein you may want to seek the services of other professionals in the same field when the previous one is related to or close friends with your spouse.
How To Manage Your Expectations
When it comes to a divorce process, you need to keep in mind that there is no “winning” a divorce case. This can be attributed to the fact that a typical divorce involves various complex issues that make it rarely possible for both parties to get what they want a hundred percent of the time. Thus, rather than thinking of beating your spouse, consider the consequences of a full-blown court battle.
A better idea is to consider alternatives to court because there are various ways on how divorce cases can be resolved such as mediation. There is also the collaborative divorce wherein all parties agree to resolve the case without having to go to court. In both of these alternatives, both parties can make their own decisions, particularly when it comes to dividing parenting time for instance.
During the divorce process, make sure that you are not only honest with your lawyer, but with your spouse as well. Your lawyer needs to know all the key facts so that he can analyze your case properly. You should also make sure to think through important decisions, considering all the potential consequences.
Be wary of what other people tell you about divorce because there are instances wherein these can be misleading. Keep in mind that every divorce has a certain set of issues and challenges that may be very different from another. The key is in thinking outside the box and trying to visualize the big picture. In doing so, you will be in a better position to forget the past and move on with your life, preparing for the future.
The process of divorce will never be easy. Even the decision of pushing through with it can also be equally difficult. However, if you find yourself left with no other choice, rest assured in knowing that you can always rely on the professionals to help guide you through the process. In this way, you will be alleviated from the extreme mental, emotional, physical, and financial stress that going through a divorce usually brings.
